Now that holiday season is well and truly over I guess it's time to get serious about work, goals, plans for now and the future. I was never really the plan ahead type, I say 'was' because I have totally done a 180 since meeting my ever organised and punctual other half. Having gone from a child of chaos to kinda having my head screwed on in a few short years has been weird but when I look back it's not just my mind that's changed.
Having struggled with my weight from a young age, dabbled in eating disorders and mental illness - you know, that old chesnut, my goals for my body have changed as much as my mind. Aiming now to be strong and healthy of mind, body and spirit instead of spending hours crying at home with a tape measure and scales and still wondering why I wasnt happier. The more open I am about my experience, the more I hear other women talking about their struggles, women who I have known for years and have never heard this chapter of their story. The more I open up, the more I accept my past and what I want to focus on moving forward.
Focussing on my body being strong, not skinny. Fitting the clothes I already have rather than aiming to get back into the jeans I had when I was sick and wishing I was that small again. When I started to let go and shift my focus from my weight to what my body could achieve, it all changed. Now instead of staring at my legs and wishing they were different, now I focus on how far they can run. That's just me and I wont lie, it's been a hard road BUT after all the years of self loathing, it's about time I shared the love with my body. Perhaps it might help you too?